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| From the Desk of Kelliann McDonald |
There's lots of talk online about change, transformation and leveling up...
But a part of change and transformation that people rarely talk about is the feeling of grief that is associated with personal change. Even more rare, is discussion about how to comfort yourself through the feeling of loss that personal change may bring.
Acknowledging this sometimes subtle, but present feeling of loss, is important because without doing so, you'll likely slip back into old familiar patterns of behavior and thought, because pushing through the discomfort of change is too much to bear without coping tools and the awareness of what's going.
The grief we're speaking of here is natural during change, as you are leaving one state of being and entering the next. It’s the letting go of the old that induces this feeling of grief and loss.
You may not even recognize it as grief at first. It may just feel like a very somber and moody feeling. Upon further introspection, it seems to be on a frequency similar to that of loss and letting go.
It’s letting go of the old familiar knowing of what to do, when to do it, how to do it— the mindless programming of a routine.
With a transformation into a new lifestyle, career, city, body, relationship, mindset or even a new haircut... you have to establish new routines, new habits— a whole new way of being.
There’s effort involved now. A presence that is newly awakened and takes more energy, trial-and-error and puts you in a more vulnerable state.
That vulnerability can induce a sense of longing for the old familiar— no matter how much the "old familiar" no longer serves you.
✨Simply being aware of the somber emotions that naturally come up when moving through change helps to sooth you through it. Resting more helps as well. Being more in "hermit mode," affording yourself the luxury of some solitude, peace and quiet time for integration of the change.✨
I find that simply acknowledging the emotion gives me the opportunity to respond from a place of awareness as opposed to react from a place of impulse.
I affirm: I give myself the opportunity to feel all my feelings. It is OK to take time to process my feelings. It is right to nurture and comfort myself, as I would a young child just learning to process their emotions on this earthly plane— allowing them to express and assuring them, by holding safe space, as they feel and work through their experience.
I afford myself the same grace.
Sincerely,
—Kells 💋
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✅ Formally a Change Management Consultant, now an Alignment Guide and Travel Advocate. I help creatives and business women calibrate to a joyfully aligned career and life by helping them curate a lifestyle that embraces all that life has to offer. (Because life is short and it's supposed to be fun!)
✅ There's new daily alignment content over on my Instagram Page and on my YouTube Community tab. I'm sharing affirmations, reflections, gems of wisdom and daily inspiration that's helped me along my journey.
✅ Here is my gems of wisdom email list for inspired messages and occasional updates. I invite you to join the Collective.
